The First Day of Class!

A.k.a. Nick Gets a Little Drunk

So today was the first day of classes at the lovely UW-Madison campus. As you can imagine, there was much rejoicing.

This story begins the day before the first day of class however. I spent most of it hungover, however I made it a point to be fully and entirely prepared for the next day.

I drank, smoked a cigar, and may have cried a little.

I also went to bed early. Yay me! Here’s the problem with my sleep schedule though. It doesn’t matter when I go to bed, it doesn’t matter what I did or am doing in the future, once my body has its five hours in you can be damn sure I’m not getting more sleep.

I went to bed at 10, I was wide awake and terrified of the day by 3.

I spent the next few hours in a stress driven haze, doing what anyone else does at three in the morning. I walked around my apartment almost naked looking for things.

Not normal people things though. Of course not. I first made sure the door and windows were locked, and then proceeded to search my apartment for potential thieves, gnomes, and, ever the optimist, the elusive and exquisite Yeti (didn’t find him.)

Finally, at 6 (I distinctly remember checking my watch at this time) I forced my body back to sleep.

My alarm went off fifteen minutes later telling me it was time to get ready for the day.

So here’s how my day starts: My apartment doesn’t have warm water. Not just that the water heater isn’t working, it’s like it’s actively working to make our water colder. The warmest water I could get was “neutral”, which in the Wisconsin January is what I imagine is roughly equivalent to the aforementioned Yeti’s piss. I’ll know for sure once I find him.

Anyways, this resulted in me having to take a sink shower.

From there it was time for breakfast. Last semester breakfast often consisted as an Old Fashioned, but I resolved not to drink before classes this semester. The problem is nearly every consumable product in my current possession is either popcorn or alcoholic. Because of this, I went full ninja and stole a can of soup from my roommates.

In retrospect, I’m pretty sure it actually was my soup from a while back. I was a little stress crazed at that point, but the beer is calming me down some now. The beer comes into the story later though, I’ll get to that! Right now, soup.

At this point, I realized all my clothes were in my room, where my roommate was sleeping. I redoned my ninja garb and stumbled around my dark room finding everything I wanted to wear that day.

There’s really nothing that interesting about this part of the story, except my roommate woke up literally ten minutes later making me feel a little silly.

Dressed and ready for the day, I set out for class.

Setting out for class was a half hour walk across the entirety of campus through the sleet because I just missed the bus and I’m too impatient to wait the 10-15 minutes it would have taken for another one to come. Go me!

After this there isn’t much interesting for me to say. The next 3 hours consisted of sitting through multiple syllabuses-


The next 3 hours consisted of sitting through multiple syllabi that did nothing more than to share information I already knew. However, then it was time for lunch. I get to talk about the beer now!

I’m a very visual person. As in, give me something to look at, I know exactly what’s going on and can handle myself in a fine, normal person fashion. As soon as everything’s audible, I run into trouble though. That’s why I’m bad at spelling bees, those jerks in the fifth grade wouldn’t let me write anything down.

Anyways, I went to order food, and even though I knew I wanted a cheeseburger, a delightfully simple order. I always, always check the menu though, so I know exactly what I’m ordering and can just read directly off of it.

Turned out the menu I was reading was actually the beer menu, so in order to cover for myself I had to order a Leinie’s. I ended up not even getting my burger.

And that’s how Nick got a little drunk. And how my first day has gone. I think that’s what this was supposed to be about… Now it’s O-Chem time though. Should be fun.

Here’s to the semester.

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